Just when you though it was safe to look back in the papers...

Is there something mentally wrong with Tevez? Seriously, no one can be this stupid and not have some deficiency upstairs. In case you weren't aware, it has been reported that he has gone back to Argentina without getting permission from the Club.

Carlos was given a full three weeks to recover from the Copa America, unlike Pablo Zabaleta and Sergio Aguero who both returned early to training after City's American tour. Needless to say, when Carlos did eventually return he wasn't match fit and there was the whole "I've got an eating disorder" thing going on in the press at the time.

There was no secret that he was overweight (for a footballer of his physical stature), and he had been so since the back end of last season. So the natural and right thing to do for City was to reintroduce Carlos gradually, and to put him on a strict training plan, which they did. That training plan has not yet been completed.

A club spokesman informed the Daily Telegraph and the Daily Mail "Carlos returned from his trip to Argentina and was not match fit. The coaches therefore devised a training plan to return him to full match fitness. Carlos is part way through that plan and is due to resume training this morning (09/11/2011) at Carrington following a rest day."

It looked as though everyone might be able to draw a line under the Munich episode, but this fresh twist in the Tevez saga comes after the player decided not to appeal his fine, which was reduced from 4 weeks to 2 weeks by Gordon Taylor of the PFA. However this is now likely to land him with yet another, and automatic 2 week fine on top of that for breaking club rules yet again.

I can only imagine what Bobby Manc is thinking now after offering Carlos a way back into the team as yet again his and the club's efforts to help the Argentine have been thrown back into their face. But what is the reason for the sudden return to Argentina? It must be a good one, surely. Carlos wanted, and I quote, to "rest a little". The less said about that the better I think.

I know I said Carlos had to be mental to do this, but let's not pretend that this is all his doing. Of course it isn't. Where there's Cash Cow, I mean Carlos Tevez (an honest mistake), there's always Kia Joorabchian riding coattails behind him. I suppose that description of Joorbollockchin is a little unfair, he's not just a passenger in all of this, he's more like the ring master of the Cirque du Carlos, controlling his every move in order to get maximum publicity and get what 'they' want is quick as possible.

Make no mistake about it, this is a cu.. (stop it), a stunt designed to reduce Carlos's stock in world football even further than it already has. This in turn will allow potential suitors to be able to afford him and will force City to accept a reduced fee for a player they are desperate to get rid of.

And who are interested in him the most? I'd have to say Corinthians, and if I was a betting man I'd put money on them releasing another statement in the next few days saying they're still interested but worried they wont be able to afford him. Just like they did after the Munich debacle.

Carlos made no bones about wanting to return there once they showed a little interest, however Corinthians just couldn't afford the asking price, and even that was reduced for their benefit. Now however, especially if Carlos keeps up these ridiculous stunts, City are more likely to accept a knock down fee for him just to get rid of the aggro he's causing.

Expect him to be playing in Brazil by the end of January. But do I really care where he goes? No, as long as he's not in Manchester.




Twitter: @MikeWalsh1880
Facebook: David-Silvas-Left-Foot

Tevez never wanted to leave... apparently

Carlos Tevez's representative has been keen to make sure he gets the right quotes out there in an attempt to patch things up with City fans after the striker blatantly said he wanted to leave... twice!

Honest Kia's football dealings make Delboy look legit.

Anyone that has followed football for any length of time will no doubt be familiar with Kia Joorabchian, the man who isn't registered as an agent but manages to 'represent' a whole load of players throughout South America and Europe. The man is a snake, a devious, self serving weasel that represents many things that are wrong with the beautiful game today.
Speaking to talkSPORT he a once again manages to talk a truck load of verbal excrement, but this is something that we're used to.

After speaking about the failed bid from Corinthians, Kia goes on to say; "We couldn't quite match what City wanted (for Carlos to leave)

"But at the end of the day - as Carlos said at the end of last season - professionally, he is happy at the club."

Oh really? I've no doubt he had no problem with his teammates, but "professionally" happy at the club? I don't think so. If this was the case then why did he put in a transfer request siting irreparable differences with Club executives Brian Marwood and Garry Cook? Or was that just a load of lies in the first place Kia? Was it just more of your backstabbing weaselly ways to get what you and your most expensive asset wanted?

"He is happy with the situation," Kia continues "it was more to do with his family really.

"He has managed to convince his wife to come over for a while at least.

"If she manages to settle in hopefully in the next four or five months, maybe he will settle down and things will be fine."

Oh joy of joys, Mrs Tevez has to be convinced to live in Manchester "for a while at least." So can we be expecting another transfer request in December or January then? Mind you there isn't much excuse now for not settling in the area. There are plenty of Spanish speaking players at City (not that there weren't before mind you) who Tevez and his wife can hang about with, some of them even have partners who will have more in common with Vanesa (Mrs Tevez).

I suspect that it possibly isn't just the language barrier that prompted Vanesa to leave Manchester in the first place. The fact that Carlos couldn't keep it in his pants probably had quite a bit to do with it. You get the sense, especially after the Argentinian chat show clips, that she wont be fully forgiving Carlos in a great hurry and who could blame her really?

The next part of the interview is hilarious for the amount of verbal defecation this snake of a men is able to produce from what I can only (politely) describe as an oral sphincter. After he's spoke about City's possible swap deal for Sneijder which was scrapped after Nasri signed he goes on to say;

"Carlos is the kind of player who adapts wherever he goes.

"He adapts to every league and has won every major domestic competition he has ever played in,

"He himself has no problem with it but, culturally, Milan or Spain would be easier for the wife to adapt to."

Deary me, adapting to a league is completely different to adapting to your surroundings outside of football. And I'm sorry, Tevez has proven he can not adapt to England. After 5 years of being in the country he is still struggling with the basics. This hasn't been helped by the fact that he couldn't be bothered to keep up his English lessons even when he was made captain at City!

David Silva on the other hand has kept up his English lessons and although not yet able to converse confident enough for an interview, he understands almost perfectly what people are saying after just 12 months in the country. Pablo Zabaleta is the same, although he's been here for 3 years, he still has English lessons and is now fluent and even has a Mancunian twang to certain words and phrases!

We're not stupid Kia. Unlike the sheep who simply believe everything they read in the tabloids we're not as gullible, we know the way you operate as you've been involved in our club since the days of Thaksin Shinawatra, who oddly enough also turned out to be as bent as nine bob note. We all know by now that you just just say whatever it is you think will be best in the long run for your clients, which in a way is admirable of you. However, it only serves your ultimate purpose of leeching ever more money off them and the clubs they're involved with.

The quicker parasites such as Joorabchian are out of the game the better.

The King is on his last legs. Crisis?

Manchester City to play hardball

The hierarchy at Manchester City have slapped a £50m price tag on the talismanic striker who has announced he must leave City this summer. It is understood that City will not be selling him on the cheap and are willing to wait out the transfer window and beyond until they get an offer they are satisfied with before parting with the Argentinean.

Tevez (27) is only 2 years into a 5 year contract at City, thought to be worth £250k a week and has already had a transfer request rejected last December. He had cited an irreparable relationship with Brian Marwood and Garry Cook as his reason for wanting to leave the club, later saying that Sheikh Mansour himself convinced him to stay at the club.

This time however, Tevez wants to leave for the good of his family as his partner refuses to move to England. This drastic change of stance has not gone unnoticed by anyone, including the fans, and they believe this is just another ploy by Tevez and his agent Kia Joorabchian to get another bumper pay day that a big money move away from the club would provide.

Out of the blue?

He has never been known for his loyalty to clubs, and headlines that Tevez “Shocked” or “Rocked” City with this new twist are blatantly sensationalist overstatements designed to make a crisis where there isn’t one.

One detail that has been slightly overlooked is that Mancini recently mentioned that "There was talk of an exchange with Eto'o, but Inter did not want to sell."

Clearly although Mancini stated that Tevez is likely to stay at the club, the latest transfer request was anticipated by the Italian and the City board alike and they had already explored certain options.

Add to this the perception that the majority of fans are tired of hearing about the transfer saga and just want it to come to a conclusion a headline of “Tevez bores City to tears with his inane whinging” would be more fitting.

Is it such a crisis?

No. Plain and simple, Tevez has 3 years left on his contract and Clubs must meet his valuation and his wage demands before he moves.

Under performing to lower his value isn’t an option for obvious reasons and would only serve to see him sat on the bench. So he really has no option other than to give his all on the pitch and so far no one at City has had reason to think he would do otherwise.

But let’s say a club does stump up the fee and match his wage demands, what then? Well City would then have £50m to spend on a replacement if they so wished. But if a direct replacement wasn’t chosen from outside the club, the Manchester outfit didn’t do too badly without him when he was injured, and actually won a higher percentage of games without him. One of these was the historic victory in FA Cup semi final against arch rivals Manchester United. Even in the FA Cup final it was Yaya Toure who came up with the goods and Mario Balotelli who was awarded man of the match.

 Who would replace him?

As far as the captaincy is concerned, there is no problem what so ever as the majority of the fans and possibly several of the players feel that Vincent Kompany should be captain anyway. Problem solved there.

And as for a replacement striker, City have been linked with a number of players across Europe since the end of the season and they certainly have the financial clout to be able to afford almost any striker on the planet.

Sergio Aguero as told Atletico Madrid he wants a move away from the Spanish club and is seen as one possible replacement.

The Napoli forward Ezequiel Lavezzi appears to be the player who most matches Tevez’s style of play but Mancini has already stated that he does not believe he is worth his £27m release clause.

David Villa is another name that has been linked with Manchester. If Barcelona goes through with their purchase of Cesc Fabregas and Alexis Sanchez they may well be forced to cash in on one or more players to balance the books now the Financial Fair Play rules have come into existence.

Of course there have been many more but do City need to buy a direct replacement when they have Mario Balotelli and Edin Dzeko already at the club?

Some would scoff at that, but let’s just consider it for a moment.

Balotelli, despite still being only 20 years old, living in a foreign country, playing in a brand new league with brand new team mates who are also new to each other, despite all the antics of this season, the injuries and suspensions he still scored 10 goals which is more goals than all of Tottenham’s strikers put together. And he is supposed to be considered a flop? I’ll leave that for you to decide.

What about Dzeko, who promised so much and ultimately under-performed last season? Again he moved after a winter break so lacked match fitness, was played out of position at times, and lacked confidence and familiarity with teammates and the new league he was in. Still he bagged 6 goals in all competitions despite aforementioned reasons.

Both Balotelli and Dzeko are expected to improve on last term along with the team in general as they began to show just what they were capable of in the last third of the season.

The truth simply is that if he goes, someone will take his place and it will be a case of "The King is dead, long live the King."